計算機沒有什麽用處.它們唯壹能做的就是告訴妳答案. －－Pablo Picasso
“Distributed file systems are a cruel hoax.” - Zalman Stern
分布式文件系統是壹場殘忍的騙局. －－Zalman Stern
“A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any other invention in human history, with the possible exception of handguns and tequila.” - Mitch Ratcliffe
人類有史以來的所有發明中－－也許不包括手槍或龍舌蘭酒－－計算機是讓妳犯錯誤最多最快的. －－Mitch Ratcliffe
“Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don’t need to be done.” - Andy Rooney
計算機使很多事情更容易做到,但其中大部分並不是必需. －－Andy Rooney
“Computers do not solve problems, they execute solutions” - Laurent Gasser
計算機並不解決問題,它們只是執行解決方案. －－Laurent Gasser
“Large increases in cost with questionable increases in performance can be tolerated only in race horses and women.” - Lord Kelvin
如果大幅增加費用換來的只是性能可疑的提升,這種情況僅僅出現在賽馬和女人身上才是讓人可以容忍的. －－Lord Kelvin
“Memory is like an orgasm. It’s a lot better if you don’t have to fake it.” - Seymore Cray (on virtual memory)
內存就象性高潮.不作假會好壹點. －－Seymore Cray (對虛擬內存的評價)
“Software Engineering is that part of Computer Science which is too difficult for the Computer Scientist.” - F. L. Bauer
所謂軟件工程就是指計算機科學中對計算機科學家來說太難的那壹部分. －－F. L. Bauer
“Base eight is just like base ten really, if you’re missing two fingers” - Tom Lehrer
八進制和十進制其實也差不多,如果妳少了兩根手指頭的話. －－Tom Lehrer
“There are 10 kinds of people in the world, those that understand binary and those that don’t.”
“There are 10 kinds of people in the world, those that understand trinary, those that don’t, and those that confuse it with binary.”
這個世界上有 10 種人,其中有些是能理解二進制的,有些則不懂.
這個世界上有 10 種人,其中有些是能理解三進制的,有些不懂,有些則把它和二進制弄混淆了.
“If you torture the data enough, it will confess” - Ronald Coase
如果妳拷問數據到壹定程度,它自然會坦白的. －－Ronald Coase
“As far as we know, our computer has never had an undetected error” - Weisert
據我們所知,我們的計算機還沒有未被檢驗出的錯誤. －－Weisert
“If you give someone a program, you will frustrate them for a day; if you teach them how to program, you will frustrate them for a lifetime.”
如果妳交給某人壹個程序,妳將折磨他壹整天；如果妳教某人如何編寫程序,妳將折磨他壹輩子.
“Documentation is like sex: when it is good, it is very, very good; and when it is bad, it is better than nothing.” - Dick Brandon
文檔就如同“性愛”,當它好的時候,簡直美妙得無與倫比；當它糟糕的時候,又糟得壹塌糊塗. －－Dick Brandon
“Programming is like sex: one mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.” - Michael Sinz
編程就好比“性愛”,壹個錯誤就能讓妳壹輩子不得安寧. －－Michael Sinz
“Perfection is achieved not when you have nothing more to add, but when you have nothing left to take away.” - Antoine de Saint-Exupery
無壹分可增不叫完美,無壹分可減才是. －－Antoine de Saint-Exupery
“Einstein argued that there must be simplified explanations of nature, because God is not capricious or arbitrary. No such faith comforts the software engineer.” - Fred Brooks
愛因斯坦經常說必定存在對自然的簡單解釋,因為“上帝”不（應）是反復無常或獨斷專行的.軟件工程師可沒有這樣的信念作安慰. －－Fred Brooks
“Managing senior programmers is like herding cats.” - Dave Platt
管理壹堆高級程序員就象放牧壹群貓. －－Dave Platt
“If the code and the comments disagree, then both are probably wrong.” - Norm Schryer
倘若代碼和註釋不壹致,那麽很可能兩者都是錯的. －－Norm Schryer
“If your computer speaks English, it was probably made in Japan.” - Alan J. Perlis
如果妳的計算機說英語,那麽它很可能是日本造的. －－Alan J. Perlis
“ ” - comment in the context-switching code of the V6 Unix kernel
這壹句比較讓人郁悶,還是不翻譯出來的好：） －－V6 UNIX kernel的context switching代碼中的註釋
“The generation of random numbers is too important to be left to chance” - Robert R. Coveyou, Oak Ridge National Laboratory
隨機數的產生實在太重要了,不能夠讓它由偶然性來決定. －－Robert R. Coveyou, Oak Ridge National Laboratory
“Before software can be reusable it first has to be usable.” - Ralph Johnson
在軟件可重用之前先得可使用. －－Ralph Johnson
“To err is human, but for a real disaster you need a computer.”
人的過失會帶來錯誤,但要制造真正的災難還得用計算機.
“Error, keyboard not found - press F1 to continue.” - BIOS system message
錯誤,沒有發現鍵盤 － 按 F1 鍵繼續. －－BIOS系統的提示信息
“When all else fails, read the instructions.” - L. Iasellio
走投無路時再去閱讀說明. －－L. Iasellio
“The memory management on the PowerPC can be used to frighten small children.” - Linus Torvalds
PowerPC的內存管理可以用來嚇唬小孩子. －－Linus Torvalds
“Never trust a computer you can’t throw out a window.” - Steve Wozniak
永遠不要信任那些妳無法將其拋出窗外的電腦. －－Steve Wozniak
“The most likely way for the world to be destroyed, most experts agree, is by accident. That’s where we come in; we’re computer professionals. We cause accidents.” - Nathaniel Borenstein
許多專家認為,導致世界毀滅最可能的原因是意外事件.那正是我們在做的；我們是計算機專業人士,我們正在制造意外事件. －－Nathaniel Borenstein
“The disadvantage of working over networks is that you can’t so easily go into someone else’s office and rip their bloody heart out” - Jim McDonald
將網絡引入工作後的缺點是,走進某人的辦公室並將他剝皮拆骨遠不如以前那麽方便了. －－Jim McDonald
“I invented it, Bill made it famous” - David Bradley (wrote the code for Ctrl-Alt-Delete on the IBM PC)
我創造了它,比爾則讓它聲名遠揚 －－David Bradley (他在 IBM PC 上寫出 Ctrl-Alt-Delete 的相關代碼)
“Unix is user-friendly. It’s just very selective about who its friends are.”
UNIX 是很友好的,只不過它結交朋友時很有選擇性